23 years of age and i have seen and been through things that not many people go through at all let alone at my age….
I lived a life with a dysfunctional family and that is putting it nicely. My childhood was fill of abuse , Alcohol , Gambling and police visits every Friday and Saturday. My Mum is with a guy who abuses her and abused me and my brother. I have experienced abuse of all kinds. Lived a life of not of love and freedom BUT a life of fear and hate. Kicked out at 15 and lets not get stated on the family i never knew till i was 12 the family thought was dead due to sick twisted lies.
Lived in more houses then i could count about 30 from memory . I have a memory that has been majorly effected and can only remember little bits of my life. Most of my childhood is a blur. School was my happy place until i started gaining weight due to stress and a health condition i didn’t know i had until later in life. Once the weight started building up the bullies started.
I moved to christchurch to live with my Nana and Grandpa the two people who i was blessed to have as a child and ended up meeting my Dad and his Mum ( My nan) and my aunty at a mall one day. This was a major shock as i had been told my dad hated me and my nana was dead. I then lived with them for a while before moving back to Auckland in the hope to move on with my life and fix things with my mum. When i arrived back i discovered she was pregnant and wanted me put into a foster home as she was afraid i would kill her unborn child. ( Which of course was FAR from the truth)
I was kicked out at 15 and ended up going to uni to finish my schooling as i never did it as school. This was another fail mainly due to lack of support and mixing with the wrong people. Depression was a very big issue from this age till now. Suicide attempts and thoughts filled the next few years of my life.
Then i meet my now Husband and his lovely family. Sent from god to save me and show me the way… I never ever thought i would be so lucky to find someone who would love me on good days and bad days but my husband sure does and so does his mum and dad. Blessed with a family and people who cared i went on a journey to find a new life and found my new life with God and Church. Such an amazing journey that is still growing daily.
Now i am in the middle of health issues… PCOS , Depression , PTSD , Anxiety , Diabetes , Obesity and awaiting on diagnosis of other conditions. My Journey right now is over coming my past finding true happiness living the life god wanted me to live. Sharing my story with others to motivate them to NEVER give up!
This is my story this is my life! I hate what i have had to see feel and go through BUT i would no change it if i was given the chance as i am who i am for what i went through. When you live the life i have you find your tribe ( the people you can count on) and you just push through and eventually everything will be okay. I am so grateful for my tribe of people and for a god that is there for me and has a plan for me bigger then i could ever imagine.
Good blog posts to help you understand more…